The past couple of weeks I have grown so doggone tired of being in my house. At one point I would say I got downright depressed simply because I was sooooo bored and uncomfortable.
Last Friday I woke up feeling a tiny bit better than usual, so I decided a trip to Hobby Lobby was in order. The triplets' bedroom didn't have a single bit of decoration and I wanted that to change. So we packed up our family and off we went.
I walked (shuffled and waddled is a better description) around for a good hour and a half in Hobby Lobby. There is not a single place to sit down in there, unless you are lucky and find an empty display shelf - which I finally did, and lowered myself down to 6 inches off the floor just to sit down for a spell. But the rest of the time was walking and more walking - which I am not very good at these days as my joints and muscles are too busy holding three babies up to bother with helping me to do things like stand or walk. I felt like a rockstar, holding my own weight in Hobby Lobby.
Then I got home, and for the next 2-3 days I could barely get out of my chair. Hobby Lobby was a bad idea. Very bad idea. I decided if I ever got the notion to leave my house again, I would only go places with wheelchairs or plenty of seating.
This past Thursday, my husband and I both had the day off so I decided we needed to get to Babies R' Us and finish up our registry. They had a wheelchair, and I will tell you, it is embarrassing being pushed around in one of those! I kept second guessing myself, thinking, "I am being such a wimp. I'm only 25 weeks along. Do I really need this? You made it though 2 pregnancies never needing a wheelchair," etc. But I knew that walking around the store would mean another 3 days spent motionless in a chair. I know it sounds like I am being dramatic, but sadly, it's reality. It is so painful to walk! To get into my Suburban takes every upper body muscle I have. To even do simple things like stand in one place and pivot my body is major exercise!
Then today, I decided to venture out (with my husband driving me, of course...I am not sure I even remember how to drive. It's been weeks) to Joann's for a few things to finish up the crafts that I bought at Hobby Lobby last week. I called ahead first to make sure they had some kind of a wheelchair. They have an electric scooter. Cool, I thought.
First, those things are kind of fun. But again, I felt so embarrassed as I drove around the store, this relatively young girl passing elderly ladies who could have beat me in a foot race with plenty of time to spare. I again kept telling myself I was such a wimp, I looked foolish, employees in the store must think I'm taking a joy ride and must be mad at me, etc. I saw people watching me as I rolled by, or passing me in the aisle that the scooter was taking up half of, and I was just sure they were either inwardly laughing at me or cursing me (I'm paranoid). I felt very humbled by the whole experience, as I realized I needed to admit my limitations and accept them, no matter what the people around me were thinking.
I'm not used to feeling that way, and it was kind of a tough pill to swallow. I'm sure I will swallow a few more of those during this pregnancy. It made me feel a lot more compassion for people that deal with chronic pain in their lives. At least I know in a few months my body should be relatively back to normal - I mean, I should at least be able to walk again without wincing every step. But some people will deal with it the rest of their lives. As I was heading out of the store, I met an older lady who asked if I was done with the scooter, and as I was clearing out my stuff to give it to her, we were talking and she mentioned she had barely been able to walk for 35 years. I can't even imagine, and it really helped to put my small problem into perspective, especially as she told me her story while keeping a cheery disposition and then sending me on my way with a hearty congratulations. She could've become bitter after that many years of pain but she was just the opposite. I thought she was rather inspiring. I hope I could be as positive if I were dealing with something like that.
On a lighter note, I am now getting asked the golden question "Are you due pretty soon?" and yesterday the cashier even asked me "Are you in labor?" I have to admit I take great joy in shocking them with the reply "My due date isn't for three more months," and then answering the confused looks on their faces by telling them it's triplets, and getting another look of shock. Great fun!
Tuesday is my next ultrasound. More then!
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